Thursday, October 13, 2011

Stillness

As I am typing this post the thoughts of mounds of homework, mounds of laundry, and mounds of house cleaning pass through my mind.

But right at this hour, this moment, this second, you are more important.

Today I would like to talk about STILLNESS.

How do you still yourself?

What kind of mirror image do you see?

How important is that image?



The last thing I wanted for this blog is to have it be about me. But to get my messages across to you loving and wonderful people out there in the cyber world, I have to use examples of what (life lessons, life happenings, feelings, etc...) has gotten me to where I am today. I do not want you to think I'm self-centered, and there may be some experiences of mine that match yours.

How do you still yourself? How do you reach down and find your inner self, your inner strength, the sincere you?

Are you one that likes to sit in nature, breath deep the air of seasonal scents? What about yoga? Yoga can be very relaxing and mind stimulating. Or maybe you are one that likes to remain in the hustle and bustle of this busy world and visit a public massage parlor. Whatever technique works for you is what's best for you. Finding our inner selves is very important. We should be able to listen to our own advise, knowing it's the best advise, instead of running to others for opinions and direction. And I'm not going to lie....I have not found my full inner self yet, but I am getting there. I still have doubts and feelings of insecurity where I seek direction and advise. But that feeling is getting smaller. I am becoming bigger, stronger, and I tend to rely on my own advise and direction, knowing that my own advise is solid.

What works for me is: I wait for complete darkness, draw myself a bubble bath, light candles, and just relax. I allow my mind to clear so I can reach deep into my inner thoughts. I can see clearly my own good advise on moving forward, where I want to be, and how I'm going to get there. I am my best critic.....WE are our best critics.

The experiences I have faced in my life have forced me to get in touch with my inner self. Figure out why I'm here, what my purpose is, what my passion is, and knowing the difference.

Two years ago I lost my job of 22 years. My life crumbled right before my eyes. The company I worked for decided to take their facility over seas. I was stuck in the routine of the working world. Go to work, take care of my family, take care of my home, be dependent on money, etc... I was going through life like a robot. Doing the same things over, and over, and over....
Since I am an observant person to what is going on around me, I noticed the downfall in the company almost a year before it actually closed. Sure, the loss of my job affected me emotionally, and I spent a couple months feeling sorry for myself, and did a lot of crying. But I pulled myself up out of the ashes of doom and I placed myself in school. I have been attending college for the last three years. With my job going over seas, I was awarded an education program called the TAA (Trade Adjustment Act). While the TAA is a government program, I am not allowed to work. I have taken full advantage of this opportunity to clear my path and begin fresh. I also do tons of volunteer work. If I keep myself busy I don't have time to dwell on the past or make myself depressed.
It's funny how things happen....Sure, I was scared when my job ended, but this change in my life is what has helped me find my inner self and my inner passion. The one that has been dying to break free for years. If you don't follow your passion you are truly missing out on something wonderful.
My passion is to publicly write, and look, I am doing it. I am fulfilling my inner self, my authentic self, even if no one reads it.... I'm not making any money, but my self-worth is being found. My self-worth is being powered by the inner me, the sincere me, the thoughtful me....

Following a passion - Even if you can't make a living at following your passion, you are fulfilling your self worth. You are able to express yourself and portray the importance of why you are here on earth.

My passion gives me a feeling of being free, it is meaningful to me, and I am expressing myself in the way that it suits me. The way that it makes me feel happy.

What kind of mirror image do you see? What is your shadow image like?

Fear is a normal shadow image for almost everyone, I think. The way the economy is today I think would scare the be-Jesus out of anyone, but when we stay true to ourselves we should be able to overcome that fear.
My shadow image, the one that keeps following me around and is being a real pain in the butt, is the fear of not achieving good grade marks. When my marks aren't good I feel like a failure. But that is my own ego/anger issue that I have to deal with. My ego/anger is the emotion that I need to control, just as well as you will have to when you find the inner you.
I also fear the thought of my schooling coming to an end (next May). Education has become an addiction for me, and I'm afraid when it's all over I will fall right back into that robot way of living. I'm afraid to cut that cord because I fear I will lose my inner self, my authentic self, and my passion.
Therefore, since I have found it, I need to keep it.

How important is your inner image?

Stimulate yourself and give thought to a new way of experiencing your life and your self-worth. Dig deep and find the hidden you, the one that you know is there, the one that heeds your passions. That person is there, believe me. Do you really want to live a robot life without expressing yourself? Wouldn't you rather enjoy the journey of life instead of racing to the end?
Life is a journey, not a race. Enjoy it, live it, breathe it, and fulfill it. You were placed on this earth for a reason. Find your passion and let it loose.

Enjoy the journey of your life, not the desperate need to finish....

Hugs for Always,

Angie


2 comments:

  1. What a thought-provoking post. I like the questions you ask. I am always thinking :-) but the times when I really have quiet and purpose to my thoughts is probably very slim. I like the idea of more focused thought and these questions are a good way to do that. I also like the idea that the more we do this, the more we learn to rely on our own intuition rather than seeking advice and guidance. I do that too much!

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  2. Very nice post Angie! You are a gifted writer, and I love that you ask questions to make us, the reader, think about things for ourselves. It took over 40 years for me to find myself, but I'm a much more contented person and like myself better, but it was those 'valleys' in life that brought me to where I am. Oh how I love these words to a song...God is too wise to be mistaken...God is too good to be unkind...so when we don't understand, when we can't see His plan, when we can't trace His Hand, trust His heart. =) XO ~The Better Baker

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